Friday, 30 January 2009

Leprechauns and Varnish

This week has completely run away with me! As though a troupe of leprechauns arrived with little rucksacks and sleeping bags, having decided to camp out on my floor. Such disruption! I have tripped over them in the dark, found their laundry heaped in the dishwasher, a bottle of Extra Old Cognac ... drained (yes, the little people do enjoy a drink), and two litres of pineapple juice have simply disappeared. (Did they mix that with the cognac? Yuck.) And I can’t even speak of the mess in the bathroom.

The leprechauns eventually moved on to pastures new, just before I took delivery of 3 hand-carved screens, which came all the way from India. How exciting! I immediately unpacked the grubby boxes on the boring beige carpet in my living room. I knew my attitude was cavalier. But dust can be vacuumed up.

Not until all 3 screens were out of their packaging and arranged with abandon around the room, did I notice that my hands were not grey with harmless dust, but dark brown and sticky with ... VARNISH. The screens had been packed before they had dried!

And the marks on the carpet could not be sucked up with the vacuum, although I tried and tried. The carpet is stained with VARNISH.

Could I have been more stupid? The answer, of course, is NO. :-/


Whirlochre said...

Did the leprechauns bring their pets? That's when it gets really bad. I've still got three miniature fish tanks full of fish from their last visit, the little blighters.

Mary said...

The leps took their pack of dogs with them. But goodness knows what I’ll find when I’m ready to brave the bathroom. Hopefully NOT tiny crocodiles in the sink ... like last time.

Natalie L. Sin said...

Just tell people it's a tiger-print carpet.

Mary said...

Natalie - LOL! :)

Stuart Neville said...


Mary said...

Stuart - I’m thinking of writing a lifestyle manual: “How to Wreck a Pristine Property in Only Seven Months!” ;)